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Caribbean Cruise - July, 2005:
The Ship

I honestly had never considered that I would enjoy a vacation on a cruise ship until just a couple years ago.  What piqued my interest were the rave reviews that both my parents and our good friend Mark each respectively gave when they happened to take their first cruises around the same time a few years back.  When my mom realized that we were beginning to have enough interest to look into a cruise, she and my dad offered to treat us to our first cruise, providing we would (of course) agree to hold off on any other plans so that it would, in fact, be our first cruise.

 

I made many mocking jeers at the other tourists boarding the boat at several stops who were taking special pains to step back and get a "portrait" of the boat.  In retrospect, ironically, I've noted that the boat never appears as more than the backdrop to any shots we took - in fact, only one shot, a portrait Pam and I had done (not this one) in the Bahamas, actually features the whole boat in one frame.

Ah, well... the shot to our left was kindly taken by strangers using my digital camera as we were preparing to re-board the boat in Ocho Rios, Jamaica.

Once boarding the boat in Fort Lauderdale, we were quickly mesmerized by the great opportunities for views that our room's private balcony offered.  The views to the right and left are seen here to the right and left... of course, with my parents in the room next to ours, you can see where their balcony conveniently had a little lean-and-chat space with ours.

We watched for quite awhile, until the ship was pulling completely free of Fort Lauderdale and into the Atlantic Ocean (below).  We were so taken that Dad had to remind us a second and third time that we needed to move out for dinner (below right).

A quick note about the meals: this was another element that very surprised me in the way that my true preference seemed to directly contrast with my expectations.  I had thought I would most prefer to avail myself of all the little free quickie food options often throughout the day around my own choices of activities.  Instead, I found that dinners were one of my favorite parts of the experience, for several different reasons.  First, the service and food were both an outstanding treat - better selection that I had imagined, and food so good that I was willing to try unfamiliar things (the risk was often rewarded); besides, amongst the "always available" choices were fettuccine alfredo as an APPETIZER... indeed, I enjoyed that almost every night.  Second, I'm not reluctant to admit that sitting down to a served meal with my family every day for a week was a very rare treat; I don't see my brother and my parents anywhere as often as I'd like with my regular-life busy schedule, and I really enjoyed the luxury of their company (even getting to fully enjoy a meal unfettered with my wife was, sadly a rare luxury with our schedule!).  Third,  dining together each night was a great way to share experiences on our own during the day and compare notes to plan for anything together at night we might like to do. 

Those evening activities varied.  On one night, we availed ourselves of the movie played on a large screen at night on deck under the stars.  It was fun, albeit a little rough on my buns - my old tailbone injury acted up after trying to sit on a deck lounger for too long (a position that puts a lot of the pressure right on the tailbone).  On most nights, though, we tried the shows.  Now, here I admit a third reversal for me... I had anticipated not at all caring for the shows, because I imagined they'd all be Las Vegas dancy things and low quality unknown acts.  On the whole, I was quite pleasantly surprised.

A quick note before I tell you about the acts: the performances took place in one larger theater venue, and a smaller "clublike" venue, which I preferred.  The smaller venue was decorated in an interesting and impressive way in an Egyptian theme (I took the two poorly lit shots above in an attempt to have something to share with our ancient Egypt fan Greg at home... ah, well), with tiered seating by comfortable individual chairs around tables.  As a theater person, the comfy, family-group oriented seating reminded me of home (Appleseed Productions).

On the first night, we went to a "welcome" performance that was sort of like a sampler, and which did a good job of showing me that I wouldn't care too much for the "musical" shows, but that the single acts were actually very good.  My favorite of those acts (and I think this is a unanimous favorite amongst our party) was Steve Moris, a comic who worked as the opening act for the Beach Boys for many years.  I actually remembered seeing him before, I believe on television; his mix of silly standup and music (powered by some very apt acoustic guitar playing) is a perfect evening of entertainment, and his little performance in the "welcome" show convinced me to give his entire act a try later in the week, which I am very glad I did.  If you'd like to learn more about him, he has a fairly good website (click here).

The other performers included a comic magician who bore a spooky resemblance to Anthony Michael Hall and whose off color humor was another perfect mix, and a comic juggler whose carefully choreographed audience participation was immensely entertaining.  The only big loser was the comic the ship picked up at a midway port in exchange for Moris, a deplorable man whose act was one long plagiarism of other famous comedians... seriously, my brother, my wife and I actually sat through his act directly citing what entertainer he was directly stealing from at each moment; sadly, his delivery (peppered with the obnoxiously annoying "trademark" phrase "you don't have to look far for the jokes") made the already deplorable plagiarism almost unbearable.  I wish I could remember the names, particularly of that last guy who deserves a tremendous negative review by name (and who further proved himself to be a dodo by being verbally abusive the cruise staff when we ran into him later that night at the buffet) , but alas they have slipped my mind.
At some ports, the cruise ship docks; at others, the ship uses several motorboats that otherwise hang around its midsection with the lifeboats to ferry passengers between the ship and shore.  Those boats (right), called tenders by our very British ship crew, seat about 20 - 30 people in somewhat uncomfortable fashion, but I guess it's a necessary evil in some places where there is no safe way for a ship the size of the Caribbean Princess (largest in their line) to dock, or when there is a virtual fleet of ships trying to send passengers ashore all at the same port.

 

If you had asked me to rank my interest in the different ports we would visit on the cruise BEFORE our cruise, I would have told you I was most excited to visit Jamaica and Grand Cayman, with Mexico a far third (because of what I perceived would be unwelcoming, crowded, unfriendly ports and locals) and the Princess Cays island in the Bahamas dead last (because I figured it was a cheap way to add a fourth port to the cruise for the cruise company, since it's just a private reef owned by the cruise company with nothing but beaches).  It's really ironic, then, to note that I LOVED Princess Cays the most, solely for the couple of blissful hours we were able to spend swimming in the ocean off their beach... as it turned out, it was the cleanest and safest opportunity to swim, and because only our ship was welcome, it was far less crowded (not having to share the port with the travelers of any other ships).  Sadly, I got no photos there because I was having far too much fun to take any.  For photos from our other ports of call, check out our other photo albums.

One of the ports we stopped in had an interesting history, regardless of the actual location it serviced.  In Ocho Rios, Jamaica, we docked at the James Bond Pier, called thus because it was the location of filming for much of the "villain's lair" footage filmed for the vintage 007 movie "Dr. No."  Pictures of that particular pier are below...

There are three particularly interesting stories that I should share from our trip which don't warrant their own page: the saga of the luggage, the adventure of the hurricane, and the tale of the casino.

1: The Saga of the Luggage

Our good friend Mark forewarned us prior to our leaving, through experiences of friends of his, that we should pack enough clothing and all our toiletries in a carryon bag to last a couple days, as checked luggage is sometimes lost and takes days to "catch up."  We thankfully heeded his advice, which proved crucial to our enjoyment of the cruise when the substandard, careless porters at the Miami Airport somehow lost one of our bags: the one containing Pam's entire wardrobe.

It started as a good natured joke, since we figured something like that would happen to one of us.  But as we moved on to days two and three and the representative on the ship became more and more desperate, we our amusement turned to frustration.  When we had to have them wash Pam's two sets of clothes for re-wears, and news came back that a full ship search and other phone calls all came up empty, our frustration turned to anger.  Finally, we reached despair when he gave us the insurance forms and the "go ahead" for Pam to buy all new clothing, as he believed we might never see that bag or its contents again.

Well, as I write this, it has been almost two months since our cruise, and we continue to have heard nothing of that bag, containing all of Pam's favorite clothing (much of it irreplaceable like her adult Winnie-the-Pooh overalls and her favorite dress clothing, and others very pricey like her contacts and several new outfits she had bought for the cruise).  While we are told insurance will cover up to $500 in replacement purchases, the policy coldly requires us to make the purchases and send receipts... and as teachers go through the second half of an unemployed, no-paycheck summer... we don't have the money to pay for their mistakes, even temporarily.  I don't hold out much hope that it will turn up any more, and it serves as an important reminder: as great as the cruise company was at everything they directly did, and as hard as they worked to make it all okay when crisis struck, they had no control over the disgusting, shiftless fools that mishandled our luggage in Miami, both losing that bag and then damaging and destroying several items during their safety search upon our return.  I will be insisting on handling my own baggage as much as possible the next time I take a cruise, and I won't be packing anything of value besides clothes... which we will liberally spread out through our baggage, not consolidating all of one person's clothes in any one bag.
2: The Adventure of the Hurricane
A couple of days into the cruise, Pam and I were watching CNN (recent world events prior to the cruise, as well as the tragic mass transit bombings in London that occured during our cruise, had us paying closer attention to CNN than we otherwise might have while on vacation) when we heard of the growth of tropical storm Dennis, and its projected path, which closely followed that of our ship's second-half journey.  Others in our party were dismissively skeptical that we would see anything of the storm at all, or that it would be so bad at all.

By our second port of call in Jamaica, however, you could, in fact, see evidence of the system as its farthest arms passed over (above right and below left).  It was upgraded to Hurricane Dennis, and was getting plenty of news coverage as the strongest hurricane to hit this early in the season in almost a century.

At our later ports, there were twice as many ships as intended, because others had been diverted from their intended ports due to the hurricane.  Our path ended up actually playing a kind of low grade "railroad chicken" with the storm, as we traveled quickly north and then east to try and cross to Florida as the storm raced northwest from below Cuba toward the west coast of Florida.

Our final day in the ship was especially influenced by the hurricane, as whipping winds wreaked havoc on the exposed decks and caused their closure.  At one point, a "rogue wave" hit the boat, knocking it free of the stabilizers that normally held it steady and tipping it sideways drastically - Pam and I were in the main lobby at the time, and it was something like a scene from Titanic, with objects crashing and shattering and people sliding along the incline.  Once the ship righted itself, though, it was smooth sailing once again.
Dennis wasn't through with us, though.  It knocked the boat about mightily on our final morning, closing the Fort Lauderdale port and forcing all 3000 passengers, now checked out and locked out of their staterooms with everything on the ship closed, to pile into the theater spaces and wait for hours.  Hefty travel delays due to weather then met us at our airport transfer, extending the trip home to an all-day affair.
3: The Tale of the Casino
Over the past few years, I've grown a particular love of poker (read all about it on my poker stories and strategies site Hold or Fold: click here).  Mostly I play for fun only with friends, but on occasional visits to the casino I've held my own.  Oddly, in addition to the table poker (the only real place to have a chance at coming out ahead over the long run, since you're playing against other players rather than the house), I have an especially strange luck at video poker.  At every single visit to the casino (many now), regardless of how I do at the tables, I come out ahead of where I was when I sat down when I play video poker... I've nursed an initial $20 ante well over $200 on the casino card, and I've NEVER been down for even one sitting.  I freely admit this makes no sense, since the house is supposed to eventually win out over the long run (and I've certainly played enough to count as the long run).  Frustrated joking friends have begun to claim it has something to do with the video poker at the casino we visit, and I'd always figured them to be right.

However, on one "at sea" day on the boat, while my wife relaxed in our room with a book, my brother AJ and I checked out the casino on the boat, a rather nice one.  I was mostly disappointed because I'd hoped they would have a poker room, but the closest thing they offered was three-card-poker at a table versus the house (which I'm smart enough to know the house will always win, and will therefore only play to lose and have fun).  With some time yet to burn, I pulled out $40 and handed one of the $20 bills to AJ, and invited him to join me at the bar to play with the video machines they have up there.  We each fed in a $20, grabbed a drink, and played our chosen game; AJ varied between draw poker and his favored blackjack, while I stuck to jacks-or-better draw poker.  After a little over an hour, he said he had finished his stake and was ready to go, so I cashed out...
 

Well, let's just say it forever proves that my luck is ME and not our local casino, as I cashed out well over $100 in tokens from that machine, all still from my original $20 stake.  We scooped up the obscene pile of tokens into a large bucket and returned to the staterooms to show off our winnings to my wife.

Now, when I play games like this, I don't gamble - I feed in my money and consider it GONE, payment in full for the fun of playing the game, and intend to walk away with nothing.  So, that giant bucket of tokens was really just unexpected fun stuff, and I took great pleasure in, for once, treating my mom to a visit to the casino later that night to blow some of those tokens on her favorite weapon of choice, the slot machines (and a real total money sink, if I'm allowed to say).  Even with all five of us playing, we couldn't spend all the tokens, and I had many left nonetheless.  On our last day at sea, AJ and I returned to the casino where we frittered them away on a variety of games, including one stint at the three-card-poker table, all just for fun of course.

 

Click here to return to the Caribbean Cruise 2005 Album page

 

Note: All photos in this gallery are in an adjusted, altered format from the originals, in order to conserve disk space on the server.  If you would like a copy of the original, higher quality file, maybe because you or someone you know is in any of these pictures, or maybe just because you're a little strange, email me and I'll do my best to accommodate any reasonable and non-spooky requests.

Oh, yah, one other note.  We're pretty loose about who does the shooting... I don't personally take credit for all these shots, as it isn't unusual at all for Pam or one of our friends to fire off a few too... just to be ethical about everything (Do you REALLY want me taking all the shots?  Didn't think so.).

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Questions?  Comments?  Email me at gjhipius@twcny.rr.com. 

 
© 2005 Greg J. Hipius, All Rights Reserved. This page was last updated on January 03, 2009